


Waiting Up

by thegreatficmaster



Series: Supernatural Collection [71]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Arguing, Character Death, M/M, Reader-Insert
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-12
Updated: 2019-08-12
Packaged: 2020-08-19 21:35:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,094
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20216641
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thegreatficmaster/pseuds/thegreatficmaster
Summary: Jensen lies awake at night, thinking of Y/n, unable to sleep.





	Waiting Up

He stared up at the empty ceiling, the bed feeling cold without y/n’s body beside him.

He sighed. 

He always did this. 

The alcohol was wearing off, the desperation to see y/n again coming back in tonnes, washing over his heart and drowning him in sorrow.

Waiting up till late at night, waiting for y/n to come back home.

He was a busy guy, whether it was work or friends, y/n often left the house, coming back late and slightly tipsy.

Jensen knew this wasn’t because he was a drunk, but the meetings did often require y/n to wine and dine, so to speak.

So he’d stay up, waiting for the yellow cab to pull up outside the gates, listening for y/n opening the front door and stumbling up the stairs.

Then he’d get into bed, no shower, no washing up, no change of clothes.

He was usually just too tired, so Jensen would get up, take y/n’s jacket off, shoes and socks and let him get comfortable in bed, some water on the nightstand.

He’d wait, making sure y/n wasn’t about to vomit, and then climb back into bed, slipping in behind y/n and pulling him close.

It didn’t matter that y/n was always out with other men and women, or that he was barely home. 

As long as he came back to Jensen, that was all that mattered.

Jensen didn’t care if it was midnight or almost six in the morning, he just couldn’t sleep without y/n besides him in bed.

He turned to his side, staring at the empty spot besides him and smiled sadly.

Why did he have to get into the dumb argument for? 

He always wanted y/n to have a good time when he went out. 

But for some reason, this client was someone Jensen hated.

Another Hollywood actor, Mark Petersburg. 

Not very big, but his ego was huge. 

Jensen had worked with him once before and found him to be an arrogant asshole. 

So when he found out that was who y/n was going to meet, Jensen flipped.

_Usually he was supportive, but his anger took over. _

_He yelled, arguing y/n shouldn’t go, that he should cancel the meeting and never work with him._

_Y/n argued just as hard. _

_This was his career. _

_He never complained when Jensen had love scenes, thrusting into women, kissing their lips, caressing their skin. _

_Sure, he knew all of it was fake. But it still hurt him just a little to see his husband like that. _

_Yet, he never complained. Never brought it up. Never once told Jensen he needed to refuse, turn down the scene and demand they rewrite._

_But Jensen just wasn’t listening. _

_He wasn’t the jealous type. _

_He knew y/n was all his. Their vows said so. _

_But the anger and his slight hatred for the Mark dude were clouding his mind._

_“Well, if you’re gonna go and do this, don’t come back”._

_Y/n’s mouth fell open when Jensen said that._

_He didn’t understand why this was such a big deal to Jensen, but he never thought he’d go that far._

_“W-what?”_

_“Don’t come back. If you go to meet him, I don’t want you home tonight. You can find somewhere else to sleep”._

_Jensen had no idea what he was saying then. _

_He’d been up for hours, the alcohol and the emotions were all influencing him, but he still said it._

_“No! This is my house too. Hell, it’s more my house than it is yours. You’re up filming and I’m the one down here. So, no. You don’t get to kick me out.”_

_“Like hell it’s your house! I pay for everything. You barely make any money compared to me. I paid for this house. I paid for the bed, your car, and the bills. That’s all me. So I get to do whatever the hell I want”._

_Y/n scoffed._

_“Well I’m sorry I don’t make as much money as you, Jensen. I’m sorry I’m not some actor on some crappy show like you. I’m sorry I actually make my money while I’m at home, and don’t just leave for months on end. We can’t all stand around, say a few lines, and get paid. Some of us have to work hard and do things we don’t like”._

_Jensen glared at y/n, clenching his jaw._

_“Get the fuck out!”_

_He stormed forward, pushing y/n and shoving him out of the bedroom and down the stairs._

_“Jensen! What the fuck are you doing?”_

_“Get out! You don’t wanna be with some shitty actor? Get out then. And don’t fucking come back. I don’t wanna see you in this house again”._

_He slammed the door in y/n’s face and ignored the desperate yelling and pleading, putting the door chain on and dragging himself to bed._

Jensen grabbed the pillow beside him and clutched it close, inhaling the scent of y/n.

He ran his hand down his face, just now realizing he was crying as he felt the wetness.

He’d gotten his wish. He’d never see y/n in this house again.

He remembered the call he got, telling him y/n was in an accident.

Jensen rushed to the hospital, but by then, y/n was already gone.

The words ran through his head each day, remembering that the last thing y/n would’ve heard from his husband, was to not come back. 

Now, he never would.

So Jensen took to drinking, drowning his sorrows and trying to forget. 

Forget that he lost his love. Forget he lost his husband and forget the words he said. 

Just forget.

But life wasn’t like that. 

He couldn’t forget. 

He’d have to live with the pain of knowing what he did, what he said, what he could never say again.

He couldn’t sleep without y/n, so he resigned himself, a lifetime of staying awake and wishing y/n would come back.

Wishing he could fix it. 

Wishing he could take back what he said. 

But that would never happen, so he’d take up the habit of staying up, waiting for y/n to come back, wishing it was all a dream. 

Jensen knew there was no falling in love again. 

No one would come close to y/n. 

So he’d just wait for the day they could be reunited, and hope his apologies would be accepted, living happily, wherever they both ended up once they left the world.


End file.
